Communicate, communicate, communicate. Since pain can be difficult to explain and at the same time difficult to understand, it is important to discuss the subject between partners, Communication will prevent tension and misunderstandings that may arise in the relationship.
Have a hot bath! This can relax your muscles better and can temporarily relieve your pain and lack of flexibility
Relax and don't rush. Before beginning sexual activity and depending on the type of lower back pain you're experiencing, work on relaxing affected muscles, if appropriate.
Get comfortable by using pillows. "Lying flat on your bed puts 55 pounds of pressure on the spine. By simply putting a couple of pillows under the knees, the pressure is cut in half. You may also find relief with a pillow under your head or your lower back.
Try different positions. In general the person with back pain should be the passive partner when it comes to sexual activity — if you have lower back pain, you might do better on your back. Others find success with both partners being on their sides. Alternative positions for a woman include lying on her stomach with pillows under her chest or lying prone on the edge of the bed with legs dangling off the bed.
Make adjustments. It makes sense that, depending on the location of your pain, some sexual positions will be more and less comfortable than others. People with lower back problems like sciatica or a herniated disc tend to feel more pain when bending forward, while those with spinal stenosis may find bending backward to be more painful.
Let your body be your guide. If lying on your back hurts, you may want to be on top during sex, or vice versa. Side-by-side or spooning positions can take pressure off the back.
Make sure you get enough variety. Don't stay in the same position for too long; make sure you have plenty of variety. Switch between lying and sitting positions and take a short break occasionally if you need one.
Make your partner work. If you have bad back pain, you can ask your partner to take the slightly more active role. If you do this carefully and with the right level of humour, your partner will not have any problem with this.
React during lovemaking. Lower back pain can also occur during lovemaking. This can be particularly painful during an orgasm. Reduce this pain by lifting your legs. The shooting pains then usually diminish straight away.